I am incredibly slow at this, look at that it's been a month since I have written. Here I find myself posting when I'm low and feeling down. I need to start coming here and posting when I feel good, I promise I have good days I'm a fun person and I want people around here to see that side of me as well. So here is my pledge to get better at this blogging stuff and post when things are good, not just when they are bad.
Things have been tough this week, one of my dearest friends went into labor last night. Starting last Thursday it hit me that her due date was here and the baby was bound to arrive at any point. It hit me hard and I cried hard, I am soooooo overly excited for my friend but it reminds me of what I don't have and what I long to have. It hit even harder the night before last as my period started, yet again. The 24th period in our two year battle.
I know someday somehow we will have our child and we will offer that child more love and support than any child ever. Lol I know we all say that and you know what it's the truth. There are some ABSOLUTELY LOVED CHILDREN out there and some flickers in our eyes just waiting for their turn. My mom, who is a great suport system, actually told me that now she has an excuse to spoil her grandchild rotten. I can't blame her, any grandma that has to wait this long for their only grandchild has every right to spoil them rotten.
Just so you know, I'm ending this post with a smile on my face and some hope in my heart.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
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1 comments:
There is only one sure thing on this roller coaster ride...tears. They come when we expect them and they come when we least expect them. Both of my best friends have beautiful baby girls and as happy as I was for them, every time I left the hospital, I cried the entire way home. Even now, in the midst of adoption, with a heart full of hope, I cried (just now) after watching a video my friend put together of his son's birth. I couldn't help it. I will never know what that experience is like...
Don't apologize for the down times. We all have them, and thankfully this is one place we can air them.
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